It’s the Dog Days of Summer. What the heck is going on? That’s kind of a rhetorical question and yet I wouldn’t mind an answer. It’s been hot here. Sure I know it’s hotter in other places of the world, but it’s a relativity thing. When it gets hot I don’t feel like doing much. […]
Summer Flannelbane 2: The Revenge of Swamp Ass
Two years ago, Summer Flannelbane set the world on fire. Now it’s time for Summer Flannelbane 2! As I’ve gotten older and grumpier, I can say with nary a doubt that summer is my least favorite season. It’s hot, smelly, stuffy, smokey. I have the option to go out anytime because it isn’t raining. Unfortunately, […]
Darth Vader: Space Dick Head
Face it, Darth Vader was a bad dude. The mere mention of his name, if it were even spoken aloud, sent chills running down the spines of all that heard it. Made their b-holes shrivel like deflating balloon. He could lightsaber duel like no-one’s business and force choke people when he was feeling blah. When […]
Break Time: Time For A Break
Hey y’all, it’s time for a break, break time! I’m going to do the responsible thing first and say, that I’m not planning on any new posts for the next three weeks. No, it isn’t because you’ve done anything wrong. It’s definitely me. Furthermore, I can neither confirm, nor deny, that there may, or may […]
Ollie’s One Year Anniversary: We’ve Had Ollie For One Whole Year!
It’s Ollie’s one year anniversary! We’ve had Ollie for one year today! How amazing is that? We adopted this little blonde dog a year ago. He peed in our car before we had even crossed back over into Canada. Which was only about eleven blocks. He just couldn’t hold it. When he and Bleu met, they […]
Sick On My Birthday: You Didn’t Have To Patient Zero
Well, it’s finally happened. I’m sick on my birthday! It took nearly half of my calculated life expectancy based on the national average life expectancy. I thought it could never happen to me. I’d never be sick on my birthday! Seriously, what kind of loser catches a cold in July? It’s hot, the human body isn’t […]
Nintendo Classic: Revenge of The Virtual Boy or Wii U
A ways back I wrote this charming piece about the Nintendo Classic. In it, my abject skepticism for the Nintendo Classic was expressed. I had no hope and wasn’t looking forward to feeling like a T-Rex when holding the controller. Then I saw one in action and my stance softened. Then Nintendo killed it with […]
Constipation: The Choice of a New Generation
My friend, Machismo Wainwright, recently suffered a bout with constipation. Now, I know you may not want to know about it. Hell, I didn’t even want to know about it. The thing is, we both know about it now, so what the hell. Machismo simultaneously informed myself and several other infirmed souls of his constipation. […]
Another Sunburn: How Could It Even Happen?
I got another sunburn. This is the second one in two months. While the last one took place on a warm, sunny day, this one happened on on that was cloudy and cold. That’s right, it’s colder halfway through June then it was about a month ago. I’ve worn shorts and t-shirts on many occasions […]
Phone Case: The Case of The Missing Case
Phone case, does one’s phone truly need one? I mean they protect our phones and everything, but are they really necessary or are they just one more way to milk us for every dime we have? For those that missed it, I got a Google Pixel, but I didn’t get a phone case for it […]