Asics I bought a pair of Asics last weekend. I’m a runner, I guess. I’ve been running long enough that I should just be considered a runner. Thing is, I don’t exactly look like a runner. Nor do I do all the weird things runners do. I’ll see you in hell before I attach a […]
Werther’s Originals: It Wasn’t Meant To Be A Tangent
Werther’s Original I haven’t even gotten over the hill yet and I already smell like an old man. This is mostly due to the Voltaren I just coated my arm and knee with. Recently, my natural musk is an odd mixture of medicine cabinet mint and Werther’s Originals. Are there even any other kinds of […]
Windows 10: Three Updates Too Many
Windows 10 Windows 10 was given to me for free by Microsoft. I was one of those free upgrade from Windows 7 people. Which was kind of a downgrade really or so I hear. Quite a few folks seem to hate Windows 10. Some compare it to Vista, which is unfair and uncalled for. Some […]
Crossing The Street: Take One Of These
Crossing The Street Crossing the street is a dangerous thing many of us take for granted. We stop and wait for the little man to tell us to go, look both ways before crossing the street, and then we step off the curb and into the rest of our lives. Which honestly may not be […]
The Bird’s The Word: I Forgot The Bird
The Bird’s The Word The bird’s the word. Sometimes as I’ve gotten older, especially with all the added stress of adulting, I forget the bird. That means that I forget a word from time to time. A word that, much like a bird, flutters off when I approach. A few days back I had such […]
Portmanteau: When Used For Ill, Not Good
Portmanteau A portmanteau is typically a pretty good time. Some can be pretty fun to say and they’re almost always fun to create. There’s just something about taking two words and cramming them together so hard that a few of letters from each respective word just shoot out to the side never to be heard […]
Shrugs: Why Do I Go To The Gym?
Shrugs, Proof That Humans Don’t Know They Are The Punchline Shrugs are a silly exercise that requires humans to grab far more weight than they can comfortably lift and then proceed to repeatedly shrug. As if to answer the questions they silently ask themselves, “Why did I grab so much weight, why do I do […]
SEO Made Me Do It: New Words For The Year
SEO – Search Engine Optimization SEO made me do it! SEO makes a lot of people do a lot of things. Good things, mostly weird things, always narcissistic things that reek of desperation. It’s the reason why people create web pages devoted to lists. SEO causes people to make punchy sans-article titles and sentences. There’s […]
Everybody’s Hugging Everybody: The Great Unification of 2018
Everybody’s Hugging Everybody. Everybody’s hugging everybody. Champagne and other alcohol fly in every which way. Little pieces of paper descend from the sky. People turned to gravity and said, “Hold my nachos.” Whether people were shockingly disappointed or super duper excited, people dropped whatever they were holding and clung to one another. The Eagles won, […]
I Bought A Mouse And Gained A Kindred Spirit Acquaintance: Chad
I Bought A Mouse. I bought a mouse over the weekend. After six years, two of which involved a lot of false double clicks, I pitched my Razer Naga and bought a Logitech M720 A.K.A Triathlon. I realized that I wasn’t so much into gaming mice anymore. While I do play games on my PC, […]