The following is a little satirical article I’ve had sitting in a folder for awhile now. Thought that Election Eve would be a special enough occasion to pull it out. Enjoy! Or not.
Over the last few weeks, the Trump campaign has experienced more than it’s fair share of setbacks. Many of these incidents occur when he opens his mouth in public or around recording equipment. Most recently were the recordings of him displaying how to sexually harass women. Not that anyone with a good judge of character needed a tape of him demonstrating how to be a gross 80’s Guy to know that he’d probably done such things.
As soon as that tape was released, Mike Pence began to distance himself. Saying that, “He was disgusted and was going to pray for Donald and his family.” In an effort to look like good people, other republicans began to renounce their support. During the same period, it was announced that Pence was a front runner for president in 2020.
When asked, Pence responded – after several minutes of anti-Hillary commentary – with this, “To answer your question though, I’m flattered that the GOP has put me at the top of their list. However, after running with Donny for the last year, I’ve lost my taste for politics. It’s really done a number on me. I feel that something higher is calling me. Something that is bigger than me, America and Donald.”
When asked if that calling was philanthropy, charity, or to help the down trodden, he just looked as if he’d never heard anything more off base in his entire life.
“No, I’ve been in talks with Hollywood producers about portraying a role that has been near and dear to my heart for a long time. A man that I grew up watching and who helped shape me into the exemplary man I am today. I’ve been tapped to play Race Bannon in the live action Jonny Quest reboot in 2020. Heck, it may be even sooner if Donald’s past keeps catching up with him and we don’t get into office.” He finished with a wry grin.
Jonny Quest fans, keep your fingers crossed.