Williams Lake: Pre-Mature Injectulation

break time

I heard something interesting on tonight’s news. Something that was interesting only because of how out of left field and uninformed it was. Something that made me stop preparing dinner and walk into the living room. Something that made me sit down and giggle.

Williams Lake is a small town in British Columbia. It is just about six hours north of Vancouver. Apparently crime and crazy are running rampant in that town. So much so that the city council voted unanimously to “inject” high risk and prolific offenders with GPS technology. Something that doesn’t really exist except on the pages of sci-fi novels and probably in tin foil hat top secret government hoobajoobery labs. Not only that, passing such laws seem a bit out of the jurisdiction of municipal government.

City councilman Scott “His Hair Isn’t The Craziest Thing About Him” Nelson put the motion forward. He also mentioned something about watching these criminals 24/7 all year round. Of course, he wouldn’t be watching them. Unless is magic eight ball counts and only during commercial breaks of reruns of Conspiracy Theory with Jesse Ventura.

I am of course, putting words in Scott Nelson’s mouth. Which is probably better for him in the long run. At least he won’t sound as crazy. While I am helping him out, he also said “Why not graft rainbow colored angel wings and unicorn horns to the offenders as well. At least that way, people will see them coming!”

If I lived in Williams Lake, I think I would be furious that time and money were spent voting on such an insipid topic. What it really sounds like is that the powers that be have lost control and don’t have any idea what to do.

 

2 Comment

  1. They’re everywhere! They’re everywhere! A Calgary council(wo)man tried to enact a law that banned all weapons in the city. I guess she hadn’t heard that, Stick and stones will break your bones….because I can’t afford to buy a gun. 🙄

    1. What constitutes a weapon? How would people cook, play baseball and change tires?

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